Missing Shih tzu

I thought I'd be a good wife and ride into work with my husband this morning. Since it was a Saturday and he'd only be at work a few minutes in Nashville, I thought we'd have breakfast at the famous Pancake Pantry. Fred HATED his food. For Fred to leave sausage on the plate it had to be worse than bad - it had to be REALLY bad. My meal was about a C- but apparently a few grades better than Fred's.
I got the brilliant idea that since we were in town we could swing by Verizon and see what kind of free phone upgrades they would offer me. I was second on the list and 45 minutes later I walked out without getting help or my "free upgrade." Then I thought since I was in Green Hills that I might swing by the meeting at the Bluebird Cafe and surprise my old buddy, Joe. It's a damn good thing I didn't try to talk Fred into that idea as a little "bluebird" told me that ol' Joe played hookie and skipped the meeting. As I was leaving the Verizon store my breakfast started bouncing painfully through my intestines and I thought the safest thing was to head for home (approximately one hour away) as I'm starting to pay some serious attention to my belly.
I jump out of the car, fly through the front door and holler for Gus, my loveable and faithful companion as I run full speed into the bathroom. Gus does not respond. For the next 30 minutes that I spend in the bathroom I continue to call Gus - no answer. Now Gus isn't the most prompt responder and doesn't really like to be inconvenienced when asked to respond but he does like to hang out in the bathroom when it's occupied. He thinks the shower is his personal drinking fountain. Gus isn't responding, I'm panicked and somewhat "trapped" in the bathroom. Fred, of course, has taken his usual horizontal position on the bed while I'm searching every nook and cranny for Gus. He has obviously been kidnapped because I know exactly how and where I left him when I left for Nashville and he's got such a great deal here on the farm that he'd never dream of running away. Certainly he's been kidnapped and I'm going to find the ransom note laying in my house.
It's possible, I deduct, that my neighbor Sonja has come over and killed him for romping with her Shih tzu, LuLu, and, no doubt, empregnating her. (Pulling LuLu and Gus apart is a whole nother blog and hold onto your horses faithful followers because I have never seen two dogs stuck together while humping! What a fiasco trying to pull them apart was!) Now I'm sobbing, franicly search for Gus, Fred's up, pretending to look concerned, aid in the search. I'm digging in the ditches, searching under the house looking for scraps of black and white fur in fear that it may become a murder investigation. Whoever kidnapped Gus locked the gate behind him, left the tv on, and left the kitchen door open. Nic is helping Julie build a fence in her backyard. I rush to Julie's house and, alas, Gus is over there playing with Dally the demonic blue healer. Evidentally Julie came by the house to borrow some tools, thought Gus was locked away in the house for the day and figured she bring him over to her house to be Dally's chew toy for the day. He was filthy dirty, dripping wet and having the time of his life with Dally. I was never so relieved in my life. I do believe Mr. Fred may have shed a tear or two at the possibility that Gus may have been gone for good.
So all's well at the farm. Abigail is still hobbling along with her bad hooves. The goats that I bought to eat the brush are still on a hunger strike, finding nourishment to sustain life only with my daisies and zinnias . I did find 5 eggs in the "baby chicken coop" which means that I have successfully gotten 9 out of 29 Rhode Island Reds from day old chicks to laying stage. Usually they're wiped out by Mister and Sister by this stage of the game. So another sun has set on the Harvey Farm, Gus is happily chewing my phone cord in half as I'm finishing my blog, Fred is - in the horizontal, Nic is gone and I'm lovin' life. Standby for tomorrow's merry adventures